.Monday, September 7, 2009 ' 10:53 AM Y
I had a very weird dream about him the night before. Him as in the one almost 4 years ago.
It was by plain coincidence that we were both with our families, having a wonderful vacation at some sort of summer resort. I met him there but maybe, he didn't see me. It was only than did I realise how much I have hurt him than. An entire year not talking to him, seeing him looking in my direction only to turn away when I see him. There, in the dream I was dying for him, chasing him at every turn. I remember one scene. I was chasing after a bus, in search for him. Maybe it was just to apologise for my ignorance, the pain inflicted upon him but I know the pain I felt. So hurt I was that I could still feel the pain in my heart when I woke up. I even remember crying so hard, asking why I couldn't just take a look at him.
But something sweet happened as well. We went to the arcade in the resort and had a great time. I forgot the conversation part but know that it was the end. Maybe its a sign, that it was all over, just like I wanted it to 4 years back. My heart broke and I broke down into tears with it. Someone than brought me to the very same arcade to cheer me up, but tears fell like the waterfall, not stopping for me to take a breath.
Sadness overcame me the instant and despite all the comforts I get, it wasn't enough to make me feel better. Did I make the wrong decision in the past? I really don't know...
